~Meowster003

Where does artistic inspiration come from?
Thoughts? Feelings? Experiences?
How does it come to us.. seemingly from a void? The understanding of this, does it even matter?
Is there a muse that grants us the ideas that pop into our heads?


I have to stop now. Hehe.. I'm just joking . I'm working on a picture right now. It's kind of scary.. the way the "subject" stares at you. I'm debating whether or not I should post it on here lmao.. eh. There's worse things on this site I'm sure . I'm a good little girl!

I scare myself sometimes lol.
But yea.. I'd draw in school sometimes (actually most of the time) and have to worry about teachers looking over my shoulder or something. Not that my pics were that bad.
One teacher looked over my shoulder once when I had "CAST", which was the crappiest thing in the world where you had to stay after school an extra two hours doing homework, and crap.. like detention I guess, and well the teacher had to go " Are you drawing dirty pictures?" (suspicious b**ch. ahem..). It was just a picture of Talena, and Blaze hugging T.T.. Yeah that's all it was X).
I got in trouble mostly 'cause I drew when I was "supposed to be working".. heh.
But hey, with a character like mine I had to be at least a little worried of people's nosiness <.<;. Like the stories I used to write in 6th grade lol.. and one of my teachers had found the folder I had some in that I forgot in class. Anyway.. before I start feeling nostalgic (my new word of the day).

A DA gallery isn't worth much if you don't actually post things into it.. I'm sorry to the people who actually like my art that would want to see more. I just keep posting up old crap. Like fillers lol *reads too many online comics*. Meh.. maybe I should wait till I have a few new pictures to post stuff up instead of just putting up one pic as I go along. I think that kind of debases them a little.. That could just be me though <.<'.
I just can't seem to get into drawing right now. I've said it a million times, though, and I'm tired x.x. I should probably go to sleep now .

I'll have new stuff up eventually. I can at least promise that . Here's a little song for the meantime...


Just So You Know - American Headcharge
``````````````````````````````
The surface is so cold and worthless
All the things that I have still come from there
So paint the windows in front of my face
When you know damn well there's
No one behind them

I wish your body was not so warm to me
I wish your body was not so warm to me
I wish your body was not so warm to me
Just so you know

And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all
And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all

It's me against the World still I'm losing ground
And I'd kill to taste what it must be like
'Cause it's everyone of my empty parts
That you fill now

I wish your body was not so warm to me
I wish your body was not so warm to me
I wish your body was not so warm to me
Just so you know

Well, and maybe it's all for the better now
Yeah, well maybe the sound will make sense
Well, and maybe it's all for the better now
Yeah, well maybe the sound will make sense

And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all
And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all

Pause silence
Another moment dropped off
Left behind and
Hanging still
Pause silence
Another moment dropped off
Left behind and
Hanging still

You won't
See me you won't
See me you won't
See me you won't
See me

I can't
See you I can't
See you I can't
See you I can't
See you

And all it was was something
And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all
And all it was was something beautiful
When tides and dreams don't seem so tall at all

``````````````````````````````
Okay. G'night people.

Oh my god. That last journal entry.. Never again.
Got some things I've been thinking about. I'm trying not to be so lazy. I want to practice drawing more, but haven't had much inspiration for anything. There's a bunch of things I need to do. Like get a job.. heh. Nothing new has really been going on though. Just wishing I could get ideas for drawings again, and going through a nocturnal phase. I need to stop sleeping during the day <.<;.
My sister-in-law's baby shower is coming up , so we gotta get ready for that since it's going to be at our house . I'm also getting into some deep discussions with a friend of mine. Which we're doing right now haha. I have no life <.<. Well... that is all.

Oh goody! A journal entry!
I've posted some things, obviously, and have been looking through all my old T9W pics. I've got them stored in folders in an old binder of mine. I never get rid of things <.<. Hey, you never know when your gonna need it .
I've been looking through them, hoping to get ideas, and some sort of inspiration, so I can draw something that has meaning. Of course then I get distracted . I'll get back to that in a minute..
A little off subject (and random), I was wondering if anyone actually felt pain, or had the sensation of pain in their dreams. I've noticed that I don't really feel pain, or have a fear of pain in my dreams lately. I was looking at one of my pics on here that was made from a dream I had where I was shot with darts <.< (the pic with Blaze in a red coat.. that was mee. lmao), and yet it didn't phase me like it would in real life. I was more worried of being caught by the bady that was after me (I woke up before I could beat his *ss. How sad..).
Heh.. then one dream I had I jumped into a huge patch of cactus, and was barefoot, but made it out of it even though I knew it was painful. Normally I wake up when something painful is about to happen, or I'm about to die. It's odd. Yes, I do have the weirdest dreams, but they're just so much fun XP. I've had too much on my mind though to sleep deeply lately. That makes me sad.
I'm in a bit of a sleeping funk though. No biggie. It's been happening a lot, but I can deal with it.
There's nothing worse then stepping on needles. Like sticker birs >.>. I stepped on a rusty three hooked fishing hook once. Not the best feeling.
I get shot in dreams as well, and it's like it doesn't even happen. I might be blocking it out.. I think I might be cracking under the pressure I'm dealing with, but there's more to it then that. My mind's been in an idle state for so long. I keep it together though. As much as I can.
Maybe it's good that I'm starting to express things more. This is still a bit deep for a DA journal entry though. Dreaming means a lot to me. Feelings are more focused, and there's a bit of freedom, but that's how dreams are o.O;. Sometimes I wonder which is my home. Reality, or the subconscious? I never have "good" dreams. My good dreams consist of freedom, friends, and a good smackdown on the enemy lol. Journey dreams are excellent. Haha.. so enough about dreams I guess.
This is the result of having "nothing better to do". I actually need to clean my room, and crap.
Jeese, well now that I've made you all read a bunch of useless information. Tata! *dances away*

Blah.





Jk .

T9W seems to be coming back to life again. Characters are coming back into existence to me in a way. I really can't explain it, and I don't want to read too much into what's been going on. I hate being disappointed, and somehow I always am. My buddy keeps calling it derealization, or whatever (I probably spelled it wrong <.<' ). Meh.
I'm writing a story based on what's happened in T9W since it just sort of stopped, and it's flowing pretty well.. It's odd. Of course I get tired, and my thinking process goes to this ".......", but it's coming along pretty well. I just need to get more sleep, and wake up at a sane hour.
I'll probably post the story up when it's gotten far enough along. The plot still needs to be "fleshed out" more. I never really write just one story it's not really like writing a novel to me or anything.. more like a chronicles, or episodes to put it the way my friend said. Just whatever I can do to express my ideas I guess. I miss being able to play video games with my buddies, and we'd act out our character's behaviors together. That was always fun. If not dorky, but hey. Like we cared :/.
Ah.. so much stuff I need to do.. I've also been playing Ace Combat 5 more. I'm stuck on this d*mn level where I have to save one of my squad pilots >.<. Yea , I really don't have anything better to say right now hehe. T9W will happen when it does. That's how it is.
So.. since I think not many people care much for T9W to begin with.. let's see. What's been going on with me.. Uh.. creative inspiration? I guess that's it, so now to play the sims XP.

DIRECTIONS!!!
Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle.

Step 2: Post the first sentence from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.

Step 3: Strike through the songs when someone guesses both artist and track correctly.

Step 4: For those who are guessing -- looking the lyrics up on a search engine is CHEATING!

------------

1. Look at me I'm falling off of a cliff now

2. If you want more beats for your buck there's no luck

3. Are you ready! (That's the very first line. Honest . Here's another just in case..) This place inside my mind

4. (This one requires two lines <.<. Other wise I don't think anyone could get it lol)
Daddy's crying, takes me a different place

5. Watching from a post up high

6. This time I'm taking it away

7. Am I going crazy

8. Lately things won't go my way

9. I stand around at American weddings

10. You and me we have no faces

11. A whole race genocide
(bet ya'll are thinking "what the hell does she listen to??" right about now, huh? lmao)

12. Today seems like a good day to burn a bridge or two

13. Tears of the feeble, hands of the slaves

14. I see the way the salesman stare into the sun

15. Yeah ya tryin' ta tire me, tire me

16. Everyone is looking at me
I can't get out of bed there is evil in my head

17. I cannot ever find a way to throw these darkened thoughts away

18. Born with insight and a raised fist

19. Let the games begin if you wanna f**k with me

20. If this isn't what you see it doesn't make you blind